Michael Phelps Caught Doing Bong Hits

Atta boy Mike!  This proves that dope really isn't all that bad for you.  For Christ's sake, we all saw that boy swim last summer!!! Story here...

Who Do You Trust More With Your Money, Democrats or Republicans?

I mean, that's what all of this noise emanating from Washington with regards to the $800 billion dollar stimulus plan comes down to, doesn't it??

And when you take even a cursory look at the facts you find that that's a pretty easy question to answer.

In eight years, from 2001 to 2009, the administration of George W. Bush took the biggest budget SURPLUS in American history and turned it into the biggest budget deficit in American history. Republicans had a Congressional majority for a majority of his term in office.

The Bush administration left office with the American economy being a smoldering wasteland: his toxic brew of multiple wars, massive tax cuts, lax regulation and oversight, and wanton spending being the equivalent of serving cyanide to a baby.

And now we're being asked to side with that party as they deride Obama's stimulus program as being wasteful???

As the saying goes, fool me once....

Iraqi's Erect Shoe Sculpture to Commemorate Bush Shoe Throwing Incident

Good for them! This incident, to me, is the defining moment in the Bush II presidency and will be studied for centuries to come (if the planet lasts that long). This and the Mission Accomplished scene--

YouTube Video: Bush Appears to Tear up at Baylor Basketball Game

Thank God this guy is a private citizen now watching second tier men's college baskeball games instead of polluting the Oval office with his rank ignorance...

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YouTube Video: Putin Tells Dell to Fuck Off in Davos

Well, not in those exact words...but you get the point.

Facebook is Gay

There. I said it. Like billions of other people these days I've given strong consideration to joining the Facebook craze, but after carefully thinking about it I've decided that it's gay, and I won't join.

This article in today's New York Times has only reinforced my decision. 'Friending' someone? 'Unfriending' someone? Give me a fucking break. What is this, high school? How fucking gay.

This isn't a diatribe against homosexuals--far from it. I mean 'gay' only as in sissy-like. Effeminate.

As a matter of fact, the only reason why I can see a heterosexual male joining Facebook would be to look up old girlfriends or high school chicks for the purpose of banging them. That's it.

For jobs, there's LinkedIn, for pictures there's Flikr, for news there's everything. Facebook is a fad that will pass. Plus, it's gay.

The Obama White House: No Jacket Required

Add this to the list of massive changes coming to the White House under Obama.

Apparently during the Bush II regime, no one was allowed in the White House Oval Office unless they were dressed in a suit and tie. Leave it to that ignoramus to focus on the important things...

How about the tidbit mentioned in the article about Colin Powell being locked out of a meeting because he was a few minutes late?

That was probably the one where they decided to invade Iraq...

YouTube: Spineless Congressman Apologizes to Rush

If you ever were wondering just how powerful Rush Limbaugh is.....

Obama: The First Week

Yeah I know the inauguration was on January 20, which is actually 8 days ago, but that first day doesn't really count because he didn't get sworn in until noon, and then went to inauguration parties until the wee hours of the night...

In short, Obama's first week has been impressive. He needed to make a dramatic break with the clusterfuck that was the previous 8 years of the American presidency and he did.

He moved to close Guantanamo Bay, became very engaged in the Israeli/Palestinian conflict, is moving at breakneck speed to pass an economic stimulus, and pointedly gave the first interview of his presidency to an Arab television channel.

There is still plenty of time for Obama to mess up, and mess up he will--it goes along with the territory. But if his first week in office is any indication, then, it's becoming increasingly clear that....

America is back.

Recently Laid off California Man Kills Himself, his Wife, and his 5 Children

What a horrific story. This guy obviously had deeper issues, but apparently his losing his job was the straw that broke the proverbial camel's back.

As the global recession (depression?) deepens, we can expect to hear similar grizzly stories in the future...

Rush Limbaugh: The Republican Leader, 2009

Even the most casual American political observer knows who Rush Limbaugh is.

Those who really follow the country's political scene these days are aware of something else, however: Limbaugh is the intellectual heart and soul of today's Republican party.

And that says something. The man is simply loathsome and hateful--his followers are the closest thing America has to fascists.

Go on Obama. The quicker you take on and vanquish this cancer on the American political system, the better off the country will be.

Army Worms Wreak Havoc in Liberia

Once again, lest you forget that the world we live in is an enormously complex, diverse place, may I introduce to you the Liberian Army Worm.

You know in the States or in Europe we might get bummed out if we lose our jobs, or miss rent or something.

We do not, however, ever go hungry....

Bloody Monday: 71,000 Americans Lose Their Jobs as Economy Goes Into Tank

It'll be interesting to see how long Republicans hold their nerve in opposing Obama's economic stimulus plan in the face of these massive, continuing layoffs.

And unfortunately, the axeman is just getting warmed up: the unemployment rate--now at about 7%, is poised to rise to around double digits at least before this is all over.

Historians disagree on the ultimate effect of FDR's New Deal economic stimulus program of the 1930's.

They agree on one thing, however, and that is that it at least gave the population hope. He provided leadership, and it buoyed the people's spirit--which is what Obama is trying to do.

So the question remains: will the Republican party choose to side with Rush Limbaugh who has openly stated that Obama fails, or will they side with the American people?

Rough Justice: Teens Toilet Paper Madoff's Palm Beach Mansion

Since this asshole is still free and able to relax in his Park Avenue penthouse, this is about the harshest penalty he has gotten so far. Can someone please explain to me how the biggest thief in world history escapes jail time when people who steal cans of tuna fish from Wal-Mart are thrown in jail??? Amazing.....

Tanzanian Albino Killings Make News

Lest you forget that the world is a complex, diverse place, I suggest you familiarize yourself with the phenomenon of Tanzanian albino killings.

Apparently the body parts of dead albinos are precious for the potions of witch doctors in Tanzania, and therefore albinos are often hunted and brutally killed.

So if you are an albino and you are reading this, it's probably best if you steer clear of visiting Tanzania.

McDonald's Profits Boom as World Suffers Through Miserable Recession

Isn't this just wonderful, cheerful news! McDonald's, a company whose food ultimately kills people, is making money hand over fist because the slop that it serves to millions is so cheap.

Hey, I hear snorting Lysol will give you a good buzz for cheap too!

A good toot of that old airplane glue in your tool box will give you a head rush for pennies on the dollar!

As we enter into an increasingly dismal 2009, America finds itself as a country of Wal-Marts and McDonalds.

Not exactly the Renaissance.

Davos 2009 A Decidedly More Staid Affair

Davos. What a joke. Citibank is sending four executives! Unbelievable. The American taxpayer is funding that particular junket, to the tune of $50k for each person.

I can't think of a more miserable experience than spending time with the self-absorbed, clueless assholes who will be at Davos this week. These are the same shit-for-brains who dreamed up the very financial schemes that are currently destroying the world's financial system.

Conceived, no doubt, over cocktails in front of a billion dollar fireplace at some hotel in chateau in Davos.

Oooh! We're soooo smart and powerful!!!!!

Will 3-D Revolutionize the Porn Industry?

The porn industry has been hemorrhaging profits for years now as free Internet websites like youporn.com and pornotube.com become increasingly mainstream.

Will the introduction of 3-dimensional pornography help resuscitate the industry?

Hey. I'd check it out!!

Dunce: Ohio Man Shows Cops his Pot Plants

Something tells me this dude is not a Rhodes Scholar candidate....

2010 Senate Races: GOP Behind the 8-Ball Again

Lest you be tempted to think that things couldn't possibly get worse for the national Republican party, please read this story.

As it becomes increasingly clear that Republicans appear poised to vociferously contest Obama's stimulus plan to jump start the economy, they walk a very fine line: America is bleeding jobs, and the people are looking for leadership--any kind of leadership.

There is a difference between providing disciplined opposition and being obstructionist--especially in this time of economic crisis. If the current Republican leadership continues to follow the lead of Rush Limbaugh and become the party of 'no', they are headed for yet another electoral debacle in the 2010 midterm elections.

Palin's $180k Campaign Wardrobe in Trash Bags

This is fitting, because today virtually the entire Republican party is in the trash can. As I've written many times, John McCain's choice of Sarah Palin as his running mate was the biggest political blunder in American history...

YouTube: Matthews Questions Whether Sarah Palin can Read

Michelle Obama Upset over Dolls of Malia and Sasha

This is a little tacky, to put it mildly. On the other hand, it's a pretty brilliant idea, and people making things and selling things is what makes the world go around. Maybe Michelle's upset she didn't think of this herself? Probably not. What do you think?

YouTube: Glenn Beck--Right Wing Nutball, Freaks out Over Lack of Bible at Obama's 2nd Swearing In

Well folks, things like this are apparently what is important today for the fringe right. Two wars? A cratering economy? Another Great Depression? Who cares! It's all about good versus evil, baby...

YouTube: Hillary Receives Warm Welcome at State Department

The career diplomats at Foggy Bottom are normally a pretty staid bunch. To give this type of a reception to Hillary Clinton as their new boss gives us a glimpse of how terrible morale must have been under the Keystone Cop/Shit-for-brains foreign policy apparatus of the Bush administration...

Traitor? Rush Limbaugh: 'I hope Obama fails.'

It's a really unfortunate phenomenon in modern day America that a hateful, destructive blowhard like Rush Limbaugh has a daily radio audience of millions across the country.

He appeals mainly to white, uneducated, xenophobic racists. You'd think even a toxic inbred lot like that might question a statement from El Rushbo like this one....

Then again, maybe not--

Irish Tycoon Offs Himself

An unfortunate trend is taking place. As the global financial crisis drags on and indeed worsens, more and more wealthy people are killing themselves as their hard earned money vanishes into thin air.

Add Irish property tycoon Patrick Rocca to the list that includes so far Madoff investor Thierry Magon de La Villehuchet, and German billionaire Adlolf Merckle among others.

The economy isn't getting better any time soon. This week brings fresh news that Britain may soon join Iceland and become bankrupt.

Expect the death count to rise.

YouTube: Bush Boo'd at Obama Inauguration

The people bid adieu to the least popular president in American history....

YouTube: U2 Performs at Obama Inauguration Concert

January 20, 2009: The End of an Error

Hopefully this blog will live on long after I am dead. This entry will deal with the two most important American political events certainly in my lifetime, and arguably in the history of the Republic: The disastrous presidency of George W. Bush, which is mercifully coming to an end after eight excruciatingly long years, and the upcoming inauguration of Barack H. Obama. Unlike a Bill Clinton or Fidel Castro speech, this will be brief.

1. The 'election' of George W. Bush in 2000 was fraudulent. It was a travesty of justice, a mistake, undemocratic. HE SHOULD HAVE NEVER INHABITED THE OVAL OFFICE, HIS WHOLE PRESIDENCY WAS ILLEGITIMATELY CONCEIVED. Even if we discount everything that happened in Florida, the tainted votes, the questionable recounts, the partisanship (his brother Jeb was governor of the state, for God's sake), the fact that thousands of Democrats in south Florida accidentally voted for Pat Buchanan of all people....If we take the tremendous leap of logic and sheer common sense and get by all that, the fact remains that AL GORE GOT OVER 500,000 MORE VOTES THAN BUSH IN 2000! If it weren't for the weird, patently undemocratic, vestigial remnant of the country's forefather's monarchical background also known as the electoral college, then the nightmare presidency of George W. Bush would never have happened. If justice had taken place, it would have never have happened.
2. In what can only be described as a moment of mass insanity among tens of millions of American voters, this illegitimate president was legitimately elected in 2004. This can only be likened to other historical acts of mass insanity such as the Jonestown massacre in Africa in the 70's, and the fact that Adolf Hitler won many elections in Germany in the 1930's. These comparisons may seem harsh, but they are accurate in the sense that droves of normally rational people can be tricked into doing irrational things by a combination of fear (9/11), propaganda (Karl Rove), and, crucially, weak opposition (John Kerry).
3. George W. Bush has been the worst president in American history. Starting with the decision to unilaterally withdraw from nuclear missile treaties with Russia early on in his term, and finishing now, in real time, with his complete disengagement and ability to do or say anything with regards to Palestine being on fire, the Bush foreign policy has been a complete, unmitigated catastrophe. It has literally set America back centuries. Complete with 'preventive invasions' (Iraq) and STATE SPONSORED AMERICAN TORTURE, it almost seems like a bad dream. This despot has the blood of hundreds of thousands of innocent civilians on his hands.
4. As shit awful as his foreign policy has been; his domestic policy, amazingly, has been even worse. He started off his term by passing massive tax cuts for American millionaires, and then became one of the first 'leaders' of any nation in world history to push another massive tax cut before launching a war. As an ideological, right wing simpleton puppeteer ed by others far smarter and devious than he, Bush continually pushed for greater financial deregulation, and memorably called for Americans in the aftermath of 9/11 to 'go shopping'. As he leaves office, he leaves a nation in economic ruins: shedding hundreds of thousands of jobs a month, mired in the worst recession in a generation, and arguably headed for a depression. His handling of the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina was completely, utterly inept, causing hundreds of citizens to perish in New Orleans. Well done, 43.

Alas, though, this coming Tuesday's momentous occasion would never, ever have been possible without the destruction of the past eight long years. A thoroughly disgusted, reeling, American public voted for the anti-Bush in Barack Obama. The beauty of our Democracy means consistent change, no matter what, with our leadership. America has made big mistakes recently, but now the world is poised to give the dream another chance. Hope reigns. Welcome, President Obama. Long live the Republic. The dream lives.

YouTube Video of Dick Cheney Falling Asleep During Bush's Farewell Address

Freak: Cindy McCain Wanted to appear on "Dancing with the Stars"

This would have done wonders for your husband's political career, Cindy. Oh wait, he actually ruined that by himself a few months ago by picking the laughably inept Sarah Palin as his VP choice...

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Focus in Madoff Affair Turns to Wife Ruth

“And he got back on the phone and said, ‘Look, Donny, we go back a long way, I’ll get you into the fund.’ ”

He told Mr. Rosenzweig that the minimum investment was $2 million. That was more than Mr. Rosenzweig had, so he asked family members to pitch in. Ultimately, his mother, brother, sister, sister-in-law and brother-in-law and an 83-year-old uncle all contributed.

“At no time did it feel like he was pulling me in,” says Mr. Rosenzweig. “It felt like he was doing me a favor.”

This is a pretty interesting article, and if anyone believes Madoff's wife was ignorant to his scam, they are in la-la land. They have been married for 50 years!

I think his sons were also aware of, if not directly in cahoots with their old man and his ruse as well.

The scope of the fraud is just too big for him to have acted alone, as he's telling prosecutors. The fact that he's not in jail but resting comfortably in his $10 million penthouse makes my skin crawl....

YouTube Video: Pantless Subway Riders Warm up NYC Commute

Ripper's Around The Horn

In a fitting end to his disastrous presidency, W awarded America's highest civilian honor the Presidential Medal of Freedom to three of the ex foreign leaders who kissed and licked his ass the most: British poodle Tony Blair, Australia's version of Dick Cheney John Howard, and Columbia's Alvaro Uribe.

From the Impossible to Fathom file, a judge ruled that the biggest crook in planet history, Bernard Madoff, can remain free on bail to enjoy his Manhattan luxury apartment while he awaits trial. Keep in mind poor people get arrested in places like Alabama and Mississippi for stealing a can of tuna fish from a Wal-Mart....

In a poignant story, former Bill Clinton aide Lanny Davis bids adieu to George W. Bush the man, not the presidency. It's fits my theory that W. isn't necessarily a 'bad' person, just spoiled, stubborn, lazy, and dumb.

Hilariously, Louisiana Republican Senator David Vitter--who was recently busted fucking a New Orleans based whore, began questioning Hillary Clinton's ethics in her nomination to become Secretary of State yesterday.

The New York Times' Frank Rich is America's preeminent political columnist. Number two is not even close. Read his latest, Eight Years of Madoffs here

From the planet Zulu/parallel universe department comes news of Sarah Palin complaining about her coverage by the media during last year's election. Has the Republican party ever been as pathetic and beaten down as it is today? Is Sarah Palin really the best they can come up with??

Speaking of Sarah Palin, it seems that John McCain's daughter Meghan isn't much of a fan of the Alaskan governor....

Condi Rice, who has been has ineffective and useless as tits on a bull as Secretary of State, was fittingly humiliated by her boss in her final days on the job. History will not be kind to Bush II's foreign policy team.....Abominable.

Video: The 23/6 Ultimate George Bush Retrospective

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YouTube Video: Prince Harry is an Idiot

Ok, no more sticking up for this guy. He's an idiot, a dolt, thick as a brick. Just plain old dumb. If he weren't sprung from the loins of a Princess, he probably would be on the dole or be working as a painter or something.

It's almost incomprehensible that he could be so dumb as to video record all this shit on his own! Prince Harry makes George W. Bush look like Albert Einstein.

All monarchies, most specifically the British monarchy because it is by far the most well known, are absolute, complete, ridiculous jokes--totally out of step and inappropriate for modern times.

We no longer burn people at the stake, stone adulterers to death, or have 9 year olds work 20 hour shifts at the factory. It's long past time that all world monarchies are abolished.

YouTube Video: 8 Years of Bushisms

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Ripper's Around The Horn

Some things that have caught my eye....

For 8 long years the Bush administration has promoted 'abstinence teaching' with regards to children and sex education. No state has gone farther in promoting this failed policy than Mississippi. As this article points out, it also happens to have the highest teen pregnancy rate in the nation.

If you're like me, then you've been spending many a sleepless night wondering just what has happened to John McCain's campaign showpiece Joe the Plumber. Happily, it seems that he's landed on his feet, using his 15 minutes of fame to score a war correspondent job with a 'news' organization. Not FOX news, either....

From the Minor Ripper economic department, we learn that Hustler's Larry Flynt and "Girls Gone Wild" creator Joe Francis are too looking to benefit from the government's recent bailout largess--asking the Treasury for $5 billion in aid for the pornographic industry.

From the 'incomprehensible to believe' or 'Twighlight Zone' department, this story tells us that Sarah Palin as of today is the odds on favorite to win the 2012 Republican nomination for president.

From the 'your taxpayer money, hard at work' department....The American military in Afghanistan has been handing out Viagra pills to tribesman like nobody's business in exchange for enemy intelligence. That's pretty funny. And weird.

In another microcosm moment for the John McCain for president 2008 campaign, this story details how his people recently sold a bunch of blackberry's--loaded with confidential information, wholesale to the public after the campaign had ended.

Dirtbag Madoff Busted Trying to Save Jewelry

This guy's balls are not only like shot puts, they are a combination of brass and titanium shot puts.

I guess I should cease being shocked about anything additional that I read about this story, but that hasn't happened yet.

My jaw continues to hit the ground every time I try to ponder the scope of a $50 billion thievery.

And, by the way, WHY THE FUCK ISN'T THIS GUY IN JAIL??

They fucking arrest and throw people in the clink for stealing cans of tuna fish from Wal-Mart's in Alabama for Christ's sake!!

YouTube of Ann Coulter Saying Jews Need to be 'Perfected'

That this woman has sold millions of books and is paid handsomely to speak at churches throughout the country goes a long way towards explaining George W. Bush's re-election in 2004.

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Another Tycoon Offs Himself as Finances Crumble

We are living through the most bizarre economic time in perhaps the last one hundred years. I use the caveat of 'perhaps' because we're not yet sure this will be worse than the great depression. It could very well be.

We now have the recent phenomenon of rich people killing themselves in the face of debilitating financial losses, apparently incapable of dealing with both the perceived shame combined with the collapse of their monetary empires.

Today it was billionaire Adolf Merckle, a few days ago it was French hedge fund manager

American Disgrace: Released Guantanamo Detainee Tells of 6 Year Capitivity

If you are an American and this story doesn't make your stomach churn, well then I really don't know what to say.

I can think of no more a searing indictment of the Bush presidency than this man's experience.

HE WAS NEVER CHARGED FOR ANY CRIME AND WAS HELD IN CAPTIVITY AND TORTURED FOR 6 YEARS!

No, not by North Korea, Saudi Arabia, or Iran, but by the United States of America.

George W. Bush your name will live in infamy. You are a disgrace and have left an indelible stain on the flag of our country.

Bill Richardson, Liar

It's been in the news recently that Bill Richardson withdrew his name from consideration as Commerce Secretary in the new Obama administration under cloudy circumstances. After digging into the story a bit, the circumstances are no longer cloudy.

Look, it's a given that all major politicians and elected officials lie. It's part of the job. Still, there's something to be said for doing so in let's just say an 'elegant' way. That means lying every now and then but not getting caught.

I've been a consistent big fan on this page of New Mexico governor Bill Richardson, even calling him the most qualified candidate for president from either party during the 2008 campaign.

Well, after reading this article, I'm not so much of a big fan anymore. It turns out that Bill Richardson is an inelegant liar. Indeed as it turns out he appears to be a sloppy, somewhat congenital liar.

For some fascinating, albeit 10 year old, reading, check this article out which goes into minutiae detail on how Richardson scrambled to get Monica Lewinsky a job on orders from Bill Clinton....

YouTube of Bush Sr. Saying He'd Like Jeb Bush to Run for President

Heaven help us..
.

Rich: A President Forgotton but not Gone

Frank Rich, NYT, 1/3/09

WE like our failed presidents to be Shakespearean, or at least large enough to inspire Oscar-worthy performances from magnificent tragedians like Frank Langella. So here, too, George W. Bush has let us down. Even the banality of evil is too grandiose a concept for 43. He is not a memorable villain so much as a sometimes affable second banana whom Josh Brolin and Will Ferrell can nail without breaking a sweat. He’s the reckless Yalie Tom Buchanan, not Gatsby. He is smaller than life.

The last NBC News/Wall Street Journal poll on Bush’s presidency found that 79 percent of Americans will not miss him after he leaves the White House. He is being forgotten already, even if he’s not yet gone. You start to pity him until you remember how vast the wreckage is. It stretches from the Middle East to Wall Street to Main Street and even into the heavens, which have been a safe haven for toxins under his passive stewardship. The discrepancy between the grandeur of the failure and the stature of the man is a puzzlement. We are still trying to compute it.

The one indisputable talent of his White House was its ability to create and sell propaganda both to the public and the press. Now that bag of tricks is empty as well. Bush’s first and last photo-ops in Iraq could serve as bookends to his entire tenure. On Thanksgiving weekend 2003, even as the Iraqi insurgency was spiraling, his secret trip to the war zone was a P.R. slam-dunk. The photo of the beaming commander in chief bearing a supersized decorative turkey for the troops was designed to make every front page and newscast in the country, and it did. Five years later, in what was intended as a farewell victory lap to show off Iraq’s improved post-surge security, Bush was reduced to ducking shoes.

He tried to spin the ruckus as another victory for his administration’s program of democracy promotion. “That’s what people do in a free society,” he said. He had made the same claim three years ago after the Palestinian elections, championed by his “freedom agenda” (and almost $500 million of American aid), led to a landslide victory for Hamas. “There is something healthy about a system that does that,” Bush observed at the time, as he congratulated Palestinian voters for rejecting “the old guard.”

The ruins of his administration’s top policy priority can be found not only in Gaza but in the new “democratic” Iraq, where the local journalist who tossed the shoes was jailed without formal charges and may have been tortured. Almost simultaneously, opponents of Prime Minister Nuri al-Maliki accused him of making politically motivated arrests of rival-party government officials in anticipation of this month’s much-postponed provincial elections.

Condi Rice blamed the press for the image that sullied Bush’s Iraq swan song: “That someone chose to throw a shoe at the president is what gets reported over and over.” We are back where we came in. This was the same line Donald Rumsfeld used to deny the significance of the looting in Baghdad during his famous “Stuff happens!” press conference of April 2003. “Images you are seeing on television you are seeing over, and over, and over,” he said then, referring to the much-recycled video of a man stealing a vase from the Baghdad museum. “Is it possible that there were that many vases in the whole country?” he asked, playing for laughs.

The joke was on us. Iraq burned, New Orleans flooded, and Bush remained oblivious to each and every pratfall on his watch. Americans essentially stopped listening to him after Hurricane Katrina hit in 2005, but he still doesn’t grasp the finality of their defection. Lately he’s promised not to steal the spotlight from Barack Obama once he’s in retirement — as if he could do so by any act short of running naked through downtown Dallas. The latest CNN poll finds that only one-third of his fellow citizens want him to play a post-presidency role in public life.

Bush is equally blind to the collapse of his propaganda machinery. Almost poignantly, he keeps trying to hawk his goods in these final days, like a salesman who hasn’t been told by the home office that his product has been discontinued. Though no one is listening, he has given more exit interviews than either Clinton or Reagan did. Along with old cronies like Karl Rove and Karen Hughes, he has also embarked on a Bush “legacy project,” as Stephen Hayes of The Weekly Standard described it on CNN.

To this end, Rove has repeated a stunt he first fed to the press two years ago: he is once again claiming that he and Bush have an annual book-reading contest, with Bush chalking up as many as 95 books a year, by authors as hifalutin as Camus. This hagiographic portrait of Bush the Egghead might be easier to buy were the former national security official Richard Clarke not quoted in the new Vanity Fair saying that both Rice and her deputy, Stephen Hadley, had instructed him early on to keep his memos short because the president is “not a big reader.”

Another, far more elaborate example of legacy spin can be downloaded from the White House Web site: a booklet recounting “highlights” of the administration’s “accomplishments and results.” With big type, much white space, children’s-book-like trivia boxes titled “Did You Know?” and lots of color photos of the Bushes posing with blacks and troops, its 52 pages require a reading level closer to “My Pet Goat” than “The Stranger.”

This document is the literary correlative to “Mission Accomplished.” Bush kept America safe (provided his presidency began Sept. 12, 2001). He gave America record economic growth (provided his presidency ended December 2007). He vanquished all the leading Qaeda terrorists (if you don’t count the leaders bin Laden and al-Zawahri). He gave Afghanistan a thriving “market economy” (if you count its skyrocketing opium trade) and a “democratically elected president” (presiding over one of the world’s most corrupt governments). He supported elections in Pakistan (after propping up Pervez Musharraf past the point of no return). He “led the world in providing food aid and natural disaster relief” (if you leave out Brownie and Katrina).

If this is the best case that even Bush and his handlers can make for his achievements, you wonder why they bothered. Desperate for padding, they devote four risible pages to portraying our dear leader as a zealous environmentalist.

But the brazenness of Bush’s alternative-reality history is itself revelatory. The audacity of its hype helps clear up the mystery of how someone so slight could inflict so much damage. So do his many print and television exit interviews.

The man who emerges is a narcissist with no self-awareness whatsoever. It’s that arrogance that allowed him to tune out even the most calamitous of realities, freeing him to compound them without missing a step. The president who famously couldn’t name a single mistake of his presidency at a press conference in 2004 still can’t.

He can, however, blame everyone else. Asked (by Charles Gibson) if he feels any responsibility for the economic meltdown, Bush says, “People will realize a lot of the decisions that were made on Wall Street took place over a decade or so, before I arrived.” Asked if the 2008 election was a repudiation of his administration, he says “it was a repudiation of Republicans.”

“The attacks of September the 11th came out of nowhere,” he said in another interview, as if he hadn’t ignored frantic intelligence warnings that summer of a Qaeda attack. But it was an “intelligence failure,” not his relentless invocation of patently fictitious “mushroom clouds,” that sped us into Iraq. Did he take too long to change course in Iraq? “What seems like an eternity today,” he says, “may seem like a moment tomorrow.” Try telling that to the families of the thousands killed and maimed during that multiyear “moment” as Bush stubbornly stayed his disastrous course.

The crowning personality tic revealed by Bush’s final propaganda push is his bottomless capacity for self-pity. “I was a wartime president, and war is very exhausting,” he told C-Span. “The president ends up carrying a lot of people’s grief in his soul,” he told Gibson. And so when he visits military hospitals, “it’s always been a healing experience,” he told The Wall Street Journal. But, incredibly enough, it’s his own healing he is concerned about, not that of the grievously wounded men and women he sent to war on false pretenses. It’s “the comforter in chief” who “gets comforted,” he explained, by “the character of the American people.” The American people are surely relieved to hear it.

With this level of self-regard, it’s no wonder that Bush could remain undeterred as he drove the country off a cliff. The smugness is reinforced not just by his history as the entitled scion of one of America’s aristocratic dynasties but also by his conviction that his every action is blessed from on high. Asked last month by an interviewer what he has learned from his time in office, he replied: “I’ve learned that God is good. All the time.”

Once again he is shifting the blame. This presidency was not about Him. Bush failed because in the end it was all about him.

One Year Ago Today: Obama Wins Iowa Caucus

It seems like it was a decade ago. Well done America.

Bushisms: An Eight Year Overview

I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Only about two more weeks before we can finally move on from this sad joke of a president....

_ "I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully." _ September 2000, explaining his energy policies at an event in Michigan.

_ "Rarely is the question asked, is our children learning?" _ January 2000, during a campaign event in South Carolina.

_ "They misunderestimated the compassion of our country. I think they misunderestimated the will and determination of the commander in chief, too." _ Sept. 26, 2001, in Langley, Va. Bush was referring to the terrorists who carried out the Sept. 11 attacks.

_ "There's no doubt in my mind, not one doubt in my mind, that we will fail." _ Oct. 4, 2001, in Washington. Bush was remarking on a back-to-work plan after the terrorist attacks.

_ "It would be a mistake for the United States Senate to allow any kind of human cloning to come out of that chamber." _ April 10, 2002, at the White House, as Bush urged Senate passage of a broad ban on cloning.

_ "I want to thank the dozens of welfare-to-work stories, the actual examples of people who made the firm and solemn commitment to work hard to embetter themselves." _ April 18, 2002, at the White House.

_ "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." _ Aug. 5, 2004, at the signing ceremony for a defense spending bill.

_ "Too many good docs are getting out of business. Too many OB/GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country." _ Sept. 6, 2004, at a rally in Poplar Bluff, Mo.

_ "Our most abundant energy source is coal. We have enough coal to last for 250 years, yet coal also prevents an environmental challenge." _ April 20, 2005, in Washington.

_ "We look forward to hearing your vision, so we can more better do our job." _ Sept. 20, 2005, in Gulfport, Miss.

_ "I can't wait to join you in the joy of welcoming neighbors back into neighborhoods, and small businesses up and running, and cutting those ribbons that somebody is creating new jobs." _ Sept. 5, 2005, when Bush met with residents of Poplarville, Miss., in the wake of Hurricane Katrina.

_ "It was not always a given that the United States and America would have a close relationship. After all, 60 years we were at war 60 years ago we were at war." _ June 29, 2006, at the White House, where Bush met with Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi.

_ "Make no mistake about it, I understand how tough it is, sir. I talk to families who die." _ Dec. 7, 2006, in a joint appearance with British Prime Minister Tony Blair.

_ "These are big achievements for this country, and the people of Bulgaria ought to be proud of the achievements that they have achieved." _ June 11, 2007, in Sofia, Bulgaria.

_ "Mr. Prime Minister, thank you for your introduction. Thank you for being such a fine host for the OPEC summit." _ September 2007, in Sydney, Australia, where Bush was attending an APEC summit.

_ "Thank you, Your Holiness. Awesome speech." April 16, 2008, at a ceremony welcoming Pope Benedict XVI to the White House.

_ "The fact that they purchased the machine meant somebody had to make the machine. And when somebody makes a machine, it means there's jobs at the machine-making place." _ May 27, 2008, in Mesa, Ariz.

_ "And they have no disregard for human life." _ July 15, 2008, at the White House. Bush was referring to enemy fighters in Afghanistan.

_ "I remember meeting a mother of a child who was abducted by the North Koreans right here in the Oval Office." _ June 26, 2008, during a Rose Garden news briefing.

_ "Throughout our history, the words of the Declaration have inspired immigrants from around the world to set sail to our shores. These immigrants have helped transform 13 small colonies into a great and growing nation of more than 300 people." _ July 4, 2008 in Virginia.

_ "The people in Louisiana must know that all across our country there's a lot of prayer _ prayer for those whose lives have been turned upside down. And I'm one of them. It's good to come down here." _ Sept. 3, 2008, at an emergency operations center in Baton Rouge, La., after Hurricane Gustav hit the Gulf Coast.

_ "This thaw took a while to thaw, it's going to take a while to unthaw." Oct. 20, 2008, in Alexandria, La., as he discussed the economy and frozen credit markets.

Ann Coulter Slams Michelle Obama in New Book

Ann Coulter is a fascist cunt. Ok, now that I've gotten that off my chest, please read this story about her upcoming book, which contains a few excerpts about her thoughts on Michelle Obama.

WATCH YOUTUBE VIDEO OF ANN COULTER GETTING HUMILIATED HERE!!

A few months ago Ann Coulter saddled up next to me at the bar along with a gaggle of her friends at a tres chic Upper East Side New York City restaurant.

MORE REPUBLICAN ATTACKS ON MICHELLE OBAMA HERE

Part of me wanted to confront her and tell her what a loathsome whore I thought she was, but I decided just to ignore her.

I couldn't help but think that maybe her shtick was after all just an act. Sheer entertainment meant to fire people up and sell books--which is clearly the effect she has on me.

YouTube Leterman Video: How'd George W. Bush Do??

Bill, Hillary, and Bloomy Help NYC Bring in The New Year